Uncertainity

July 17, 2008

I have to admit I have been having a hard time. It is almost impossible for me to focus on more than one thing. This adoption feels like I am 7 years old and it is 9:oo p.m on Christmas Eve. The problem about that is Christmas morning is not getting here.I go between being so confident and excited to feeling utterly hopeless.I know that I am in a process that is training me to be more patient,less demanding, and more trusting of God.I know that the timing of this adoption is in his hands. If I try to mess it up I will get the wrong child.Someone that works with Scott called me today and said that she had a dream and saw me holding a dark haired little girl and both of us were laughing. She said that she felt like God was saying Kati would be here sooner rather than later.This really encouraged me.I am going to start each day by giving this to God and letting him really teach me how to rest in uncertainity. I really think uncertainity is where I have always come up short. I have settled for some things because they were known rather than wait for God's best. I choose to set down my agenda and say(TODAY) that I will trust in the Lord with all my heart and I will not lean on my own understanding and I acknowledge him in this adoption process and so he has said he will make my way straight. So now I will walk down that straight path to find Kati!!!edit